STEP 1 – Stop ruining your chances with sadness, insecurity, and despair by avoiding these deadly mistakes

Step 1 is the first and most important of the 5 steps of getting your ex back. Getting through this stage helps you get closer on the journey to winning them back

The First Top Mistake

Texting, contacting exes, and seeking revenge often top the list of things people do after a breakup. Experts agree that this type of behavior not only has no effect on the healing process but can also be extremely harmful to your health.

However, among all the “mistakes” that can be made, not unfollowing, not unfriending your ex on Instagram, Snapchat, and Facebook … leaves the most “bitter fruit”.

Dr. Gary Brown, a famous couple’s therapist in Los Angeles (USA), told Elite Daily: “Going through a breakup is a painful experience. The only thing still stalking your ex does is add to and prolong your pain.”

According to a 2012 study published in the journal Cyberpsychology, Behavior and Social Network, social media tracking after a breakup is detrimental. People who remained friends on Facebook with their exes had lower personal growth than those who had unfriended them.

Dr. Brown says as a general rule, it’s best to unfollow your ex on social media for at least 90 days. After that, you may not even want to follow the other account again, because then you will have a clearer view of your relationship.

Mr. Brown explained to Elite Daily: “The more you look at your ex, the longer it will take you to move on with your own life. While not seeing them and whatever they post is heartbreaking, unfollowing them will lessen your pain in the long run.”

This is not surprising. Just imagine, it’s already sad to break up, but on the news feed, there are constant reminders of this day and that year asking why not be tied to the past. Or to see them display happy and healthy photos (although they may not actually be) and you are in pain, the more tragic it is. Not to mention the case of seeing a new love hand in hand with your ex… that’s it.

The saying “far from eye far from heart” is always true. After all, we will love again but always love yourself first and foremost. If you just said goodbye to a relationship, don’t hesitate to click “unfollow” or even “unfriend” as a measure to protect yourself, and avoid aggravating the pain.

The Second Deadly Mistake

Texting constantly your ex.

1. “I miss you”

Your ex chose to break up and now you want to get them back in your life, but your ex doesn’t miss you and is just so happy that you aren’t together. You think texting your ex saying you miss them is a way to let them know that you want them back. You may think it’s a nice gesture to melt someone’s heart, but honestly, it will only push them further away from you.

2. “I still love you”

In fact, any such statement is off-limits. You’re showing your ex that you care too much for them after you broke up.

Don’t put your ex in this situation and let them know that you still love them or ask them if they still love you. Let them have their own space and figure out for themselves if they still care about you.

3. “Can we at least be friends?”

This is a bad idea. You don’t want to be friends with your ex right after you break up. Instead, you want to get back into a romantic relationship with them.

Right now, your ex won’t agree to go out with you “as friends”. And being friends with your ex is not a good idea if you really want them back in your life.

4. “I’m depressed, and I haven’t eaten these days”

Do you want to find the sympathy of your ex? By saying you’re depressed and lonely, you’re actually pointing out the exact opposite and showing your ex that you’re down without them. You need to stop communicating with them and follow up, then consider what you want from them.

5. “I should never have dated you”

It’s understandable that you’re hurting after your ex broke up with you. But what’s unacceptable is texting them that you’re sorry you’re dating that person. This won’t help you win them back if that’s what you’re trying to hold on to.

6. “I’m Dating Someone Better”

Do you want to make your ex jealous of your new one? A little jealousy is acceptable but belittling them by comparing them to others is not.

7. “You broke my heart”

Letting your ex know that they affect you so much will only do the trick of giving them the “key to your life”. You wouldn’t want to show your crush that they have total control over you, would you? By saying that they broke your heart, you will only throw away any chance of being seen by your ex as someone of value.